Anyway, being the whiny bitch that I am, I also don’t like to have the anchor “kerplunked” in the water when approaching a pool that may hold fish. I suspect that from the fishes perspective you may as well just do a cannonball off the boat. It would probably end in the same result. So here’s the basics:

Anchor: Kersploosh!

Me (to Mike): Hey plunky. Splash that anchor again and I’m gonna hop over this brace and punch you in the face!

Mike (to me): I was trying to get you wet.

Me (to Mike, head shaking): Yeah? Well next time try rubbing the inside of my thigh.

We got skunked that day as we have every other day we have fished that river for steel.

Check back. This post could be added to in the future.

1. North Peak Brewing – Diabolical
2. Bell’s – Two Hearted Ale
3. New Belgium – Ranger
4. New Holland – Mad Hatter
5. Dogfish – Head 60 Minute IPA
6. Dark Horse – Crooked Tree IPA
7. Sierra Nevada – Torpedo
8. Great Lakes – Lake Erie Monster
9. 21st Amendment – Back in Black IPA
10. Sierra Nevada – Pale Ale
11. Rogue – Dead Guy Ale
12. Bell’s – Oberon
13. New Holland – Ichabod
14. Stone – Arrogant Bastard
15. Yuengling – Traditional Lager
16. Great Lakes – Commodore Perry
17. North Peak Brewing – Wanderer
18. High fucking Life – duh…
19. Brooklyn – Lager
20. Victory Brewing – Prima Pils
21. Bell’s – Third Coast Ale
22. Genesee – Bock
23. North Peak Brewing – Vicious
23. Arcadia – Witsun
24. New Belgium – Fat Tire (but only on tap, in cans this shit sucks)
25. BrewDog – Punk IPA
26. Avery – White Rascal
27. The Brew kettle – Red Eye
28. Maumee Bay – MB IPA
29. Red Hook – Long Hammer
30. Great Divide – Yeti
31. Southern Tier – Unearthly
32. Bell’s Hopslam
33…..Sparks?

ok ok as you can see we could not make it to 100….big deal. But you get the point. We like good fucking beer and if it ain’t good we like it cheap.

Hey have a happy 4th of July! Tight lines and all that good shit.

Clean up crew at MDOT launch. Mio, MI

This is a report from the “newbie” we took along with us for the  ASBWPA Clean Up. To be fair, this was not Scott’s first fly fishing trip so he really isn’t a true “newbie” but it was his first weekend on the Au Sable. We asked him to put together a little trip story for the Hatchless blog. He was kind enough to leave out some stuff that we may or may not remember happening. Friday night was kind of a blur. I’m blaming it on the scotch Scott brought. I am told that someone may have punched someone in the face. PBBFFFFTT, whatever, I’m sure the guy had it coming. (After all, he didn’t catch any fish on Friday, he was too busy wader shopping for the dumbass that left his waders at home.) I think some other demonstrations of stupidity also occured that night but like I said, blur…

Here’s Scott’s story.

Fly Fishing the Ausable
9/11/09
4:00pm. I’m sitting in my driveway, running through my head everything I packed and worrying about what important detail I missed. Other anxieties crop up as well. I’ve never really fished for trout before. Would I make a fool of myself on the water or what? Plus these guys, Mike, Greg, and Bill. We’ve tied a few flies, drank a few beers, and waded a stream once together, but what would they be like in close quarters?

4:10pm. Bill arrives and we load up. I know I’m missing something but I can’t think of what.

4:30pm. Loaded Mike and we are officially off!

5:30pm. Obligatory side trip to Cabelas where I purchased a 2 day Michigan license and tried not to drool over all the cool stuff.

6pm. Leave Cabellas (Almost- We had to return to buy waders for Greg)

10:30pm. Arrive at the Loop, a. primitive camp site on the Au Sable. Mike handed me a head lamp. Inside I was laughing at the need for light. I figured once my eyes adjusted I’d be okay. Wrong! The darkness greeted us and it was overwhelming. I noticed right away that looking at  the sky without any light polution lets you see the stars so clearly. After a  few minutes of marveling at that I set up my tent and unpacked the truck. Greg who had arrived ahead of us had a raging camp fire going. It was chilly so I went to the campfire and realized then that I had forgotten my chair.

9/12/09
7:00am. I haven’t slept a wink. My air matress had a hole in it and I ache from exhaustion. Opening the tent flap, I step into a still dawn morning airbrushed with fog. Dead silence. Dead still. It almost seems a shame to wake my friends, but after all, there is a river to clean and then fish to catch. I go from tent to tent trying to wake them up and it feels too much like my morning efforts to get my kids up for school.

8:10am. We park by the river and exit the truck. I see the river for the first time in the daylight. Walking toward the river I am reminded my love for water. I watch as the crystal clear water moves quickly under the blanket of fog. I ache to grab my 7 weight and start fishing and say the hell with the clean up. But I don’t let the allure of the water act as a siren call and take me away from the task at hand.

8:30am. Jazzed on coffee and donuts, handful of day glo orange bags in hand, and two pointy sticks safely stowed away, we begin our float. Lots of garbage to collect from what I hear.

1:30pm. We land at Comin’s Flats and Tom from ASWBPA greets us at the landing and says that the “Boys from Toledo” cleaned up on the raffle. We dump the trash and get fed courtesy of the ASWBPA. Turns out we won two gear bags, a fly rod, and a fly line. Cool return for our efforts. The “Big Waters Group” runs a great clean up. They greet you in the morning with coffee and donuts and send you off after the clean up with a belly full of burgers and dogs. Not a bad gig for a few hours of work and good fish Karma. After lunch we head to the drift boats and gear up. I prep my 7 weight and switch from a floating line to a sinking line. But I’m way too eager. While my friends continue their efforts to get ready, I wade in and fish.

2:00pm Let the drift begin! Now we’re fishing! As you might guess with the Hatchless crew it’s streamer fishing all the way. About fifteen minutes in I have the first hookup on a crystal minnow with an olive tail. I caught two more on an olive wooly bugger with a lot of crystal flash worked into it.

7:30pm. Tired, we anchor mid river and take a break, awaiting the dusk. These white bugs started drifting in and I saw a few rising trout. I couldn’t resist. I switched to my 5 weight with the floating line and tied on a white dry fly. I blew several strikes before finally landing one as the sun finally disappeared. When the sun was gone, we started the drift again. I kept working the dry fly in the dark, but for the life of me I couldn’t figure out how I would know if I got a strike because I could see nothing at all. Then BAM! A trout struck hard and had to be fought into the boat. After that we started mousing. This consisted of a big mouse fly being hurdled to the banks and retrieved slowly. Tricky when you can’t see in the dark. I had a trout slap at it once but that was it.

9:30pm. Our big sky moment, we dropped anchor and just enjoyed the night. The river, maybe 60 feet wide, had the banks covered in these huge towering trees. And above that a night filled with stars so bright you could practically read by them.

10:30pm. The drift over, we grabbed some food and supplies and headed back to camp.

9/13
7:30am. Up and at em! This morning we had to break camp. No fog today and noticeably warmer.

9:30am. Got my coffee and breakfast from McDonald’s while the trucks were moved around. These guys had been living off oatmeal and peanut butter for days! I don’t know how they do it, but I was grateful for something hot.

10:00am.  I only caught two today, though the others had a much more productive day. I lost a couple of flies to wear and tear and the brush in the water.

3pm. By the time we hit the landing I was ready to call it a day. I could tell I was getting tired because my casting rhythm kept turning to crap.

3:30pm. The boats are loaded and we head home.

8:30pm. Bill and I arrive at my house. As we are emptying my gear from his truck, I look up at the sky. I spot a few persistent stars but nothing like the night before. I point this out to Bill and say my goodbyes.
I am finishing off writing this article a week after we left. All I can think of is that big sky and going back. I have a nice weekend planned with the family, but it’s hard to compare to a weekend drifting the Ausable. The trip has forever changed me. I now know what fly fishing for trout is like. I now know I can hold my own out on the water. I also know that a weekend with Bill, Mike, Greg is a weekend of fun to be treasured. Thanks guys!

Here’s a few pics from the weekend.

Had a good turn out for boats this year. Here's 3 of the 7 from this year's event.

Sign in and get your raffle tickets!

Tom Buhr. ASBWPA President, 2009 Riverkeeper award winner, general bad ass of conservation.

A man and his trash poker.

Enjoy some real choice lines here from the Vegan Muse:

“the usually violent removal of a sentient being from its catered oxygenated environment and the subsequent allowance of maximum pain via suffocation upon removal, what we call fishing”; “Ethicality is thus nonexistent when one engages in the act of fishing.”

“Fish protein clogs the arteries and is damaging to both kidneys and bone. “

Thanks for that Mr. Muse. Good thing I’m a C&R Guy.

I think this is my favorite.:

“Our waters have become our sewer systems and fish are now loaded with environmental contaminants. Even wild Alaskan salmon have detectable levels of mercury. Does this sound like a food intended for human beings to subsist on? I think not.”

Seriously now, who does this dipshit think he is? Who does he think the stewards of the watersheds are? Would you plant your garden in a toxic watse dump? I bet if you did your veggies would end up with detectable levels of what ever the hell was dumped there. Let me tell you this Mr. Douchebag, oh sorry, Mr. Muse. If it weren’t for the conservation minded fisherman, many of the rivers, lakes, and oceans of this planet would be in pretty sad shape and you’re a dick for judging any one of us.

I’ll keep the boat story short but remember I said it has been four long years. Most everyone I know has been tired of hearing about it for at least 3.5 of those years or less so I’ll try to keep it short. Basically, my mother-in-law married a guy (a fly fisher) about 5 years ago with a real knack for buying all the gear he could get his hands on and enough of it so that he would always have someone to fish with even if it meant loaning gear. Well, he passed away about 4 years ago and one of his f(r)iends was storing a few boats for him. That “storage” quickly turned into hiding them from their rightful owners/conversion after the funeral. The boat in the post below was one of the boats. There are two more. After four years of chasing this slippery douchebag I got that one back. Thanks to those of you that helped with that. We’ll see what happens with the others. They could require time in court and I don’t know if that’s worth it.

So anyway, on to the trip. It was a good time despite the fact that the fish were being dickheads. Two of us managed to get up there early enough on Friday to get a quick float in. Mio to Comins in about 3.5 hrs. I said quick didn’t I? Probably a good thing since my dumb ass fell in pretty early in the float. Thank you Mr. Down coat for keeping me warm!

Mental note, when the water is high and a little off color, its better to pee off the boat rather than hop off and go to shore.

Mike moved a bunch of fish that day but only one was of any size. The rest were the standard stockers that never fully committed to the fly.

It was a beautiful evening for a float and when we got off the water we were looking at this. Looks like a potential storm but its just a normal Northern MI sky in May.

I would have suggested we hang around at anchor just before the ramp and have a few more beers but my toes were feeling the 50 deg water temp and with air temps dipping in to the 40′s we shored up and headed to camp.

Shortly after we got to camp and got set up, the others arrived. We quickly lost one to the warm comfort of his tent and after several beers and some of Kentucky and Iowa’s finest we all hit the sack. We had big plans for the morning that were fortunately not coming until 9 a.m.

Huron Pines and ASBWPA sponsored stream banks restoration project at USFS 4841. This type of project was a first for me. I have been to numerous clean ups but never a project like this so I was looking forward to getting started as it seemed at first like it would consume a better part of the day. I was amazed at how fast we got it done. We split up into two groups and banged out two erosion walls including the demo of an old one in about two hours.

No, its not through his finger, just his glove but he did it twice so I thought I’d put two pics of it up.

Here is the completed project. Big thanks to all that were involved. I look forward to the next one!

We managed to get on the water by about 1 p.m. Put in at Mio again and had trucks spotted to Mckinley. Figured/hoped we’d get off the water after dark but with the help of a big breeze and the flow being up we made it to Mckinley before sunset. Thankfully the breeze let up in the afternoon. I was starting to get tired of fighting it and teaching someone to row in that shit just isn’t fair. We did actually land a few fish even if they were just stockers and most of which were caught near the stocking points. I think I got the only brown of the weekend. A whopping 8″ fish that ate a 4″ fly that he hit twice. I love it when that happens. Makes you realize that in most cases, going big on streamers is the right decision. The fly was a 2/0 olive version of the SHF. I’m pretty sure that fly should go in to a museum somewhere if it isn’t already. Thank you Mr. McCune. I’m pretty sure that someone put on his stripe for Saturday but I won’t mention who.

More story to follow after the weekend. Hopefully there will be some fish porn to go along with it.